Guess who's won TWO IN A ROW?!

Seriously, guess. OK, it was the Sonics, who beat the Lakers 120-113 on Sunday. The biggest surprise, of course, was that Ray Allen played defense (!), holding Kobe to 22 points (1-13 from 3-point range. Ouch!). Check out the gruesome boxscore here if you dare!

Also, tune in later today for an exciting new comic from Chunkstyle!

Weekend Anchor

Much like when the weekend news telecast is staffed by the JV news-reader squad (KING 5: BAILEY Sports!), good ol' chunk is here to tide you over 'til Pete and Paul return from their weekly two-day break from high-speed internet connections.

I was there last night! It was a schizophrenic game, with a strange rhythm to it. The Supes would fall behind by 9 or so, giving the ball away, forcing shots in half court, letting the T-wolves shoot open jumpers. Then they'd pull even on good d, rebounding, and running the ball. Repeat. They seemed to flip some kind of switch in the 4th though. Watson's aggressiveness seemed to infect the whole team--even Lewis and Swift got aggressive.

I was really surprised that, given the dearth of street parking last night and the draw of a genuine superstar in Kevin Garnett, that the arena was so empty. Lots of red seatbacks were visible. Where were all the people who took my free parking? Was there a Yanni concert at Memorial Stadium I wasn't aware of?

It seemed to verify the fact that Seattle fans will always back a winner, and ignore mediocrity. Plus, you can't discount the fact that the games from here on out are meaningless. There were times last night, however, that the crowd's noise level would fool you into thinking it was a full house cheering for a playoff contender. Sigh... If only that were true...

Still, I think this team is loads more entertaining to watch now than it was, say, 2 weeks ago. For example, my unofficial statistics show that, since the trades for Watson and Wilcox, the rate of alley-oops has gone up a staggering 3000%. Bet you didn't know that. Seriously though, when Flip Murray would miss as many dunks in a game as Wilcox, Petro, and Swift are making, it makes for a more satisfying brand of b-ball.

after the buzzer thoughts:

• The past two games I've attended (G-State, Minny) have not featured half-time "entertainment" per se, but rather more basketball of a less polished variety, to which I say bravo. At G-State a biddy b-ball team from Redmond scrimmaged. Last night, the Sonics youth wheelchair team had an intra-squad exhibition. This kind of halftime show is exponentially more entertaining than some lame magic act or the "#2 ranked doubles trampoline team in the nation" (they really had that one time. ugh.)
  
• Sonics Boom Squad? Good. Sonics Dance Team wearing yellow rain slickers while dancing to "It's Raining Men"? Not good. Sonics Dance Team peeling slickers off at the chorus? They were wearing clothes underneath, but still: Good...
  
• I've mentioned this before, but the more I watch him, the more it bugs me. Rashard Lewis has forgotten how to dunk. Even as recently as last season, when he boomed that baseline slam against the Mavs in Dallas, 'shard used to take it strong. No more. Even with a full head of steam and a defender pinned under the basket, he still jumps and floats, waiting for contact, and then flips up a weak-ass layup. After such a play last night, I thought, "Shawn Marion would have dunked that. Ricky Davis would have dunked that. Flip Murray would have... tried to dunk that." Point is, how is it that dudes smaller than Rashard are unafraid to take it strong, yet this 6-10 kid with hops is going for dipsy-do scoop shots?
• If Supersonicsoul ever hit it big, there's no way our luxury box would ever, ever be empty, no matter how many games out of first the Supes are. There were two at the southeast(?) end of the arena that were totally dark and deserted. Probably belonged to some dot-coms that went nipples up in '01. What a fuggin' waste...
  

Sonics vs. Tee-Wolves

The Sonics are playing the T-wolves right now. Of course, it's hard to tell since the ding-dang game ain't on TV (stupid Pac-10 tournament . . . ).

In happier news, this Monday Chunkstyle will be bringing you the first installment of a brand new comic, "Danny Fortson: Cyborg Hunter". It was written by a very talented and sexy man, so I promise you it won't completely suck.

Sadly, the same can't be said for tonight's game (sigh).

Game Night: Grizzly

A few pieces before looking at tonight’s matchup with Memphis…

According to espn.com, Bob Hill is the 6th-least hated coach in the NBA, ranking ahead of former Sonic assistants Terry Stotts and Dwayne Casey, as well as Larry Brown (natch). It should be noted that his approval rating has dropped since December. Why? … This just in! Reggie Evans felt underappreciated in Seattle! Yeah, Reggie, we all know you’re hard working and all, but, seriously, when the entire NBA decided you’re not worth a long-term deal this past summer, don’t ya think that maybe it’s not just Seattle doing the underappreciating? … And, last but not least, the Sonics have officially inked one Marcus Fizer (congrats to sonicscentral for breaking this way ahead of the big boys). You want to hear a bizarre list? If Fizer makes it to 500 games played, he will join these guys as former Iowa State grads to have played that many games: Zaid Abdul-Zaid, Kelvin Cato, Fred Hoiberg, and Jeff Hornacek. Somehow I’m guessing that’s not a foursome you’ll be seeing at a golf course near you.

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On to tonight’s affair. The Sonics are only favored by a point, which to me is a steal. Just like the beginning of last season, the oddsmakers are going to be skeptical of the Sonics for awhile, but, to me, this team is easily capable of dusting the Grizzlies tonight. If you look at the two previous games, the current Sonics bear no resemblance to the team(s) that lost in those two outings. I’m not even worried about Collison’s injury affecting the outcome.

It will be interesting to see the Sonics match up with Memphis’ slow-down tactic (which, as this piece shows, even some Griz fans are getting sick of). Here’s some numbers for you: The Sonics take 42% of their shots in the first 10 seconds of the 24-second clock. Memphis takes 32% in that time frame. Memphis takes 20% of their shots in the final four seconds; the Sonics 11%. It’s two completely different styles: Fratello’s Slothball Crapola vs Hill’s Runners. As if the Grizzlies’ style of play wasn’t bad enough, they’re paying this guy about $6mil a year until 2010. I like to call it the Bill Curley Rule: NBA teams will always go out on a limb for a 6’9” white guy. It’s as if they think that if they keep drafting them, sooner or later they’ll find another Larry Bird. Good luck with that.

As you can tell, I’m picking the Sonics, 103-89.

My Olympic Team

(click for full size)

This has been talked about all over the internet recently, and it's a good discussion point (especially when your favorite team stands 7 1/2 games out of the last playoff spot with 23 games to play). That is, which 12 guys deserve to be on the Olympic team in 2008?

Well, here's my list:

C: Shaq
C: Ben Wallace
C: Chris Bosh
PF: Shawn Marion
PF: Elton Brand
SF: LeBron James
SF: T-Mac
SG: Kobe Bryant
SG: Joe Johnson
PG: Chris Paul
PG: Dwayne Wade
One empty spot for someone like Dwight Howard or someone else who emerges (Adam Morrison, high schoolers, etc.)

That gives us 12 guys who I'll take over any other 12 (assuming that Duncan and the rest of the non-volunteers don't want to play, either).

Collison Out 1 Month

If you haven't already added Chris Wilcox to your fantasy league team, I suggest you head on over to your home page and do so RIGHT NOW. Why? Because Nick Collison is out for 4 weeks, that's why.

March 6 Cartoon: "He Who Asks Last"

Click image to view full size

One last arena post... from me anyway. I'll leave any further political commentary to my SSS colleagues, Saints Peter and Paul.

And you thought Kenny G killed Jazz

In honor of the Oscars, it was "Brokeback Mountain Night" at the key last night.

The Sonics murdered the Utah Jazz 113-81 last night. The new guys stole the show with Earl "Wattstax" Watson lobbing a couple of Payton-like ally-oops to "Wilco" Wilcox, and a nice behind the back dish to "The Rash". Lost in the razzle dazzle last night was a solid performance from "The Omen", who snagged a career high seven (!) steals.

So, was this just a case of the Sonics beating on a crappy team, or are the Supes back in action? Or a little bit of both? Maybe we'll find out Wednesday night against the Grizz.

23 Games to Go

Will Hill step "One Toke Over the Line" again?

I’m guessing the odds for Seattle pulling an upset tonight rank somewhat lower than the odds of Rocky Balboa losing to Ivan Drago in “Rocky IV.” The Pistons, already established as the NBA’s premier team, are fresh off a dud in Denver where they played lousy basketball. And you know what that means, right? Yes, Detroit is ready to show that that game was an aberration, for if there is one thing great teams do, it’s snip losing streaks in the bud.

With that in mind, there’s really no point in breaking down the matchup. However, here’s how the other important games on the schedule tonight look:

Denver: 4 point underdogs at Houston
Lakers: 2 point favorites at Golden State
Kings: 3 point favorites at Atlanta
Jazz: 5 point underdogs vs Clippers

The way I see it, Denver, Utah, and the Lakers will probably lose tonight, while the Kings might win in Atlanta, and even that’s a toss-up. Still, it’s too bad the Sonics have to play Detroit, since they have a good opportunity to close within a half-dozen games of the playoffs. As it is, it’ll be a night of treading water in the Western Conference.

Race

In keeping with the “keep hope alive” sentiment, here’s how the teams Seattle is chasing fared last night:

Denver (current record: 31-27): W (oh, come on, Pistons!)
Hornets (31-27): L (16 points in the 2nd half?)
Lakers (29-29): L (thanks, Nate)
Kings(27-30): W
Jazz (27-30): L (gotta love that, no matter the situation)

Seattle (22-36): off

The net result is that the Sonics are now 7 games out of the playoffs, which is a full half-game better than they were yesterday. There are no games on tap for tonight featuring Sonic rivals for the playoffs.

Well, I figure at this pace, they’ll pass the Lakers by next Wednesday. Look, I know the “Sonics” and “playoffs” really don’t belong in the same sentence, but if we can’t root for the team we created a website for when they’re 7 games out, then why the hell did we make a website in the first place?

Goodbye Brrrryon, Hello Noel?

Look at the intensity on this man's face! Watch out Pistons!

The Seattle Sonics waived Bryon "My first name is retarded" Russell today. So much for our "Weak-ass Bitches Who Got Killed by MJ" feature with Russell and Craig "Mint" Ehlo.

And who's going to take Bry-Ru's spot on the roster? Our pals at Sonics Central say it's "The First Noel" Felix.

(Update: It's official. The Sonics signed Felix to a 10-day contract.)

Race to the Finish

With March upon us, the Sonics have 24 games remaining on their schedule, and they currently are looking up at the last (8th) playoff spot, 7 ½ games back of the Lakers, or 8 ½ games back of the Nuggets for the NW Division lead. Coming off a rousing win over the Hornets on Tuesday, how likely are the Sonics to make a comeback?

Let’s look at the schedules. The rest of the way, Seattle’s 24 opponents have a combined winning percentage of 54.2%, the equivalent of the Grizzlies or Hornets. The schedule is front-loaded, though, with most of the dangerous games coming in the next 3 weeks, while April is relatively easy, with matchups against Portland (twice), Houston, and Sacramento – all teams on the outside looking in for the playoffs.

In a somewhat realistic world, the Sonics could conceivably finish the season by winning 18 of the remaining 24 games, which would put their record at 40-42, definitely out of the playoff race. But by winning a couple of road games they shouldn’t (against, say, the Lakers or Memphis), the Sonics could pull themselves to 42, 43, or 44 wins, which would give them a fighting chance.

With 14 of the 24 games at home, the Sonics have an edge over the Nuggets, who will play the majority of their games on the road the rest of the way. In fact, the Sonics need only look at what Denver did last season, when Denver went on a 25-4 tear to nearly unseat the Sonics from the Division throne. It will take a similar maniacal finish for the Sonics to do the same thing. Yes, the Nuggets were starting near .500 when they went on their tear last year and the Sonics are 14 games below that right now, but the team Denver was chasing (Seattle) had a very good record, while the team Seattle is chasing (Denver), currently stands only 3 games over .500.

Can it happen? Absolutely. Will it? Well, we’ve got two months to see.