Shawn Kemp running for Governor

At a surprise press conference Wednesday, former Seattle Supersonic Shawn Kemp announced his intention to run for Governor of Washington state.

"I figured if that Donaldson dude could run for mayor, I could easily be Governor," explained Kemp. "I mean, that guy was 7-2 and could barely dunk! I'm the Reign-Man, (expletive)!"

Despite being a five-time All-Star, Kemp is a political unknown. When pressed on his policies, Kemp summed up his views in two words:

"Legalize it. Seriously, why are we still putting people in jail for pot? Do you know how much tax revenue this country could bring in from the Trailblazers alone?"

Kemp, who spent the past decade battling weight, drug and alcohol problems while attempting a prolonged comeback to the NBA, has not ruled out a return to basketball.

"I've still got game. I just beat Patty Murray in a little one-on-one last week, and have no doubt I'm up to the task of dunking on Gregoire."

"Also, did you know that Donaldson was born in England? Seriously, what's up with that?"

McLendon Facing Legal Mumbo-Gumbo

Gretchen Morgenson of the New York Times reports that former Sonic owner Aubrey McClendon is facing an inquiry in the state of Oklahoma after a shareholder of Chesapeake Energy demanded tighter scrutiny of a huge bonus McClendon received in the tail-end of 2008.

As Morenson reports, McClendon was awarded $75 million by Chesapeake and a new contract in December 2008, after his old contract (a five-year deal signed in 2007), was viewed as out of date (translation - because Chesapeake's stock had dropped so precipitously, it was no longer financially viable for the soon-to-be-broke McClendon).

Anyhow, the board of directors deemed CHK's $33 billion drop in value from July to December to be meritorious of a $75 million reward to Aubrey. The shareholders, Louisiana Municipal Police Employee Retirement System, which saw their 85,000 shares drop in value from more than $6 million to less than $2 million, didn't think so.

And so, rather than file a lawsuit, the group decided to file a "books and records demand" in the State of Oklahoma. Will this filing force McClendon to return the $75 million and tear up his new contract? Unlikely. Will this filing force Chesapeake to go through a few months of uncomfortable headlines, require the conniving McClendon to fess up to poor management, and create some unsettling feelings for the board of directors? You bet.

Couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of guys.

Donaldson To Make Announcement

Mike Seely of Seattle Weekly provides an in-depth look at James Donaldson's quest for the mayoral chair in Seattle, including news that the former Sonic will officially announce his candidacy tomorrow (March 26).

Donaldson has a tough road to travel, as incumbent Greg Nickels has deep pockets and exceptional name recognition. Still, the 7'2" Donaldson received this eye-opening bit of praise from former Tacoma mayor Brian Ebersole:

"He's one of the most modest, kind, sincere, wonderful, good-to-the-core people I know. You feel like you're in the presence of greatness, like the Dalai Lama or Jesus Christ."

Alright then.