Dear Bob,
It’s over.
I really wanted this to work out. Honest. After Nate and Dwayne left, and Phil Jackson and Larry Brown signed on with other teams, and Paul Silas didn’t want to come here, you were my top choice to coach the Sonics.
After another humiliating blowout loss last night, however, it’s clearly time for you to go. Nothing personal. You’re a great guy. Everyone loves your card tricks. You just can’t coach worth a crap.
I know it wasn’t all your fault. AD and Garbage Bag left. Vlad’s a bitch. Every team’s got problems, Bob. Great coaches figure out ways to make it work (see last season).
You’ve always been a team player, Bob, so now it’s time to take one for the team. You know Wally and Rick won’t fire you. Not their style. Quit now, before the entire season goes down the tube. I know you’ll end up on your feet, Bob. You’ve always got that modeling career to fall back on.
Lots of Love,
Paul Merrill
H.R. Dept, Supersonicsoul.com
p.s. Do you know where we can reach Paul Silas?
(UPDATE: Dag, that was quick! Bob Weiss was officially canned today. If I knew the Sonics would grant my every wish, I would've asked them to bring back the Wheedle too!)
