Multiple Choice

Yesterday, Commissioner David Stern commented during a conference call with reporters that the NBA has made "positive contact" with a prospective ownership group led by Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer, and that it is possible the league will return to Seattle soon. Based on that information, please answer the following multiple choice question:


Which thought runs through Mr. Stern's mind as he contemplates the reversal of fortune in Seattle, one in which a city hell-bent on opposing stadium funding has become one hell-bent upon spending $150 million on improving 10-year-old KeyArena?

A) "Egggggscellent."
B) Rubs hands together and makes evil cackling sounds.
C) "I love it when a plan comes together."
D) "Soon, it will all be mine. All of it!"

NBA Talks to Ballmer

It is becoming more and more apparent that the KeyArena remodel is not something that will go away anytime soon, regardless of the passion (or lack of) for such a project in Olympia.

Today's PI has an in-depth story detailing how the city is planning on using the Convention Center portion of the hotel-motel tax to fund the $75 million that the state government was either unwilling or unable to provide.

That's far from earth-shattering news, as the idea has been floated through all the local papers recently. What was newsworthy, though, were the comments David Stern made in a conference call.

In his first words regarding Seattle basketball since the Sonics moved to Oklahoma City, Stern opined that "[the NBA has] had some positive contact" with the Steve Ballmer ownership group about the league returning to Seattle some time in the future.

How that scenario would play out, and whether it would be via expansion or swiping another city's team remains to be seen.

Player's Poll

You may have missed it, but nba.com has its annual poll of league GM’s up at the moment, chock full of interesting observations from the men who thought that giving max contracts to 24-year-old underachievers was a good idea.

Not found anywhere on the web but right here, though, is the NBA Players’ Association poll, with insights into what really makes the NBA the greatest league on earth for fans.

WHICH ARENA HAS THE BEST GROUPIES?
Miami – 37%
Los Angeles – 30%
Dallas – 15%
Phoenix - 10%
LeBron’s House – 8%

WHICH GENERAL MANAGER IS THE EASIEST TO TRICK?
Otis Smith – 33%
Danny Ferry – 20%
Kevin McHale – 20%
John Paxson – 15%
Isaiah Thomas – 12% (low total due to the fact he’s no longer a GM)

WHICH PLAYER WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO BE A TEAMMATE OF?
LeBron James – 99%
Brian Scalabrine – 1%
When informed he could not vote for himself, Scalabrine changed his vote to LBJ.

WHICH COACH IS MOST LIKELY TO GET A CARLESIMO THIS YEAR?
George Karl – 50%
PJ – 22%
Larry Brown – 15%
Jim O’Brien – 13%

HAMTILTONIAN FEDERALISM OR JEFFERSONIAN DEMOCRACY?
Jefferson - 60%
Hamilton - 30%
World B Freedom - 10%

WHICH PLAYER IS THE MOST OVERRATED?
Kobe Bryant – 100%

WHICH COACH WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO PLAY FOR?
Phil Jackson – 45%
Doc Rivers – 30%
Don Nelson – 15%
Mo Cheeks – 10%

WOULD YOU AGREE THAT THE DECLINING VALUE OF THE DOLLAR DUE TO INFLATIONARY PRESSURES CAUSED BY THE RECENT $700 BILLION BAILOUT MAY IN FACT WREAK GREATER HAVOC ON MIDDLE-CLASS WEALTH THAN ABSTAINING FROM THE BAILOUT WOULD HAVE?
Absolutely – 30%
Perhaps – 25%
Definitely not, as not pursuing the bailout would have rendered the credit markets impotent, and therefore would have driven the American economy to a complete and utter standstill – 45%

HOTTEST PLAYER WIFE
Eva Longoria – 55%
Vanessa Bryant – 25%
Yeliz Okur – 20%

PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO BE PRESIDENT
Shane Battier – 35%
Ray Allen – 30%
Ira Newble – 20%
Elton Brand – 15%

CHEAPEST TEAM OWNER
Donald Sterling – 98%
Micheal Gearon Jr. – 2%

(Tip to TrueHoop for the link).

Silver Lining

If there is a small silver lining to watching the Sonics pack up the moving vans and leave town in a cloud of dust, it's that Kevin Pelton now has more time to devote to writing about the NBA.

Case in point: Pelton's inaugural attempt at recreating baseball's PECOTA predictions in a basketball context. Naturally, he calls it SCHOENE, in honor of one Russ Schoene (and if you don't know who Russ Schoene is, why exactly are you reading this website?). He'll be investigating all the teams and divisions in the coming weeks, relying on his statistical predictions as well as his own common sense.

Sadly, there will not be any Seattle Sonic predictions this season. Happily, there will be plenty of others. Among them:

-Kevin Durant will average 23 ppg on 43% shooting
-Al Jefferson is penciled in for a 20/10 season
-TJ Ford will get 18 points and 9 dimes a night
-Shaq's ppg will be less than half what he got at age 30

Check it out.

X in UFC

A humorous piece is up at World Hoops Blog about which current or former NBA players would be most likely to succeed at UFC. Of interest to Sonic fans is, naturally, seeing one Xavier McDaniel on the list (and, for the chance to, once again, catch a climpse of X going to town on Wes Matthews. No that does not get old AT ALL).

Leading one to wonder, naturally, which other players in Sonic history would answer the bell? I'd nominate Michael Cage (muscles; slippery, soul-glo-coated skin), Spencer Haywood (you don't think he'd be tough enough?), and, of course, Alton Lister, Shawn Kemp-embarassment notwitshtanding.

Any other nominations?

SSS Christmas List: Det

Casting likenesses out of plastic is an unenviable task. Even the best bobbleheads require the viewer to strain a bit to make out the face, but the recipient is usually good-humored enough to understand that the creator was facing a tough job.

But then there are other creations that, well, stink. Take, for example, this "likeness" of Detlef Schrempf, currently available on eBay.

Really? That was the best they could do? To begin with, I doubt Det's hair ever looked like that, even as a five-year-old in Germany. Second, it's the wrong color. Third, how hard is it to make a pasty white complexion when you're using plastic? And, finally, what's the deal with those eyebrows? Were they working on a Turkish line of dolls the day before they got to Det's, and just figured they'd save a few bucks and not adjust the eyebrows?

Which is why, friends, SuperSonicSoul is passing on the Detlef bobblehead and, instead, opting for this much classier piece. Take a look at the third row down, first painting on the left.

Because nothing says, "I have waaaaay too much money and don't know how to spend it" than dropping $2,200 on a painting of Detlef Schrempf sampling some Pinot.

SSS HOF #9: George Karl, Part II

Have you ever watched a five-year-old paint a picture?

In the beginning, the work appears, while often manic and confusing, promising. There are strokes of brilliance, a beautiful mixture of soft and hard brushes, and, at one point, it appears as if the entire project will become a smashing success.

Sadly, inevitably, the process cannibalizes itself. The five-year-old begins dumping all the paint onto the page, gets frustrated, throws things around the room, complains he wasn’t given the proper tools, and eventually walks away from the work before it is completed.

Likewise with George Karl’s various tenures as an NBA head coach.

I won’t speak to the other destinations in Karl’s version of The Odyssey, but even the heartiest defender of his time in Seattle would begrudgingly admit that it was a marriage marked more by conflict than agreement, a relationship headed for break-up almost as soon as it began.

That isn’t to say that Karl wasn’t beloved by Sonic fans – in fact, you could argue that he is more loved than any coach in team history, his off-the-cuff manner and everyman persona a hit with fans from Blaine to Walla Walla.

And yet, and yet … there was always something frustrating about the Karl Sonics. The Sonics’ first-round loss to Denver came the 2nd year of the Clinton presidency, yet it feels as raw and painful today as it did more than a decade ago.

There were numerous complaints about Karl’s team while he was in Seattle: that they lacked a competent half-court offense and that they could only operate successfully in the open floor were chief among them. (I can vividly recall hoping that Hersey Hawkins would prove to be the elusive spot-up jump shooter the Sonics needed at the 2-guard, only to see him be as mediocre as all the other players who passed through that spot. Was it Karl? Was it the dominating affect of GP in the backcourt? Hard to say.)

Still, those playoff frustrations paled in comparison to the wounds we would suffer as Sonic fans a decade later. Sure, it’s painful to get spurned by the girl you adore on the dance floor, but it’s even worse not to go at all.

Heck, in the decade after Karl left, Sonic fans didn’t even know there was a dance.

But back to the man himself. More than any other adjective stapled to his life in Seattle, George Karl was fun.

Frustrated because your team doesn’t have passion? Not when George is in town.

Want your guys to push the ball faster up the court? Gotcha.

Wish your coach would speak his mind and not talk in double-negatives and clichés? Not exactly a problem with Karl.

And that’s why, with the Karl Era firmly in the rearview mirror, we can look upon it as a success from all angles. Yes, he should have nurtured his relationship with Bob Whitsitt and, more importantly, Barry Ackerly. Sure, he could have taken a page from the Chuck Knox Book of Life and played the cards he was dealt a little more happily. Naturally, a championship would have been the perfect topping to the mixed-up concoction he gave us for a half-dozen wonderful years.

But to have done that would have violated his bizarre methodology. George Karl, like that five-year-old, wasn’t one to paint by numbers. He wanted big, broad strokes and flamboyant colors, by damn, and nobody was going to tell him otherwise.

Speaking as a Sonic fan, I’m certainly glad he felt that way.

SSS Book Club

Perhaps you've seen or heard that Ricky Pierce has thrown his weight behind a new book project. It's a children's book entitled "Bouncing Billy," and, according to Amazon, "combining active play in an early childhood environment has never been so much fun."

Well, sure, if you limit yourself to books penned by shooting guards with a proclivity for ball-hogging, I'm sure Ricky Pierce's book is right up there with Chicka-Chicka-Boom-Boom and all the rest.

But Pierce is not alone among ex-Sonic writers, as the following covers unearthed from Amazon attest. From nutritional advice for pregnant women to a how-to book on trash talking, you can't go wrong when you turn to former Sonics for advice.

The More Things Change ...

Fantastic photo at Ball Don't Lie of Kevin Durant and PJ .... well, you just have to see it for yourself:

J.E. Skeets is soliciting captions for the picture, with the winner to run tomorrow, so get your creative juices flowing. There are a million possibilities, but my contribution would have to be:

-----

Carlesimo: Charlie Brown Adult Voice

Durant: Okay, so if I opt out after 2011, that makes 1,050 more days of his crap. Wait, is there a leap year next year?

SSS Christmas Wish List, #2

If you look closely enough at the photograph, you can see a 12-year-old Gary Payton aiming a basketball at Westphal's head.

Stadia

Shown below is a listing of all publicly traded companies with NBA Arena naming rights, and their corresponding stock valuations as of September 14th, 2008 and October 14, 2008.

GP Wants the Sonics Back

A couple of stories this morning about Gary Payton's comments regarding the return of the Sonics to Seattle.

The most noteworthy quote comes courtesy of the Associated Press:

"I think before 2011 a team will be here," Payton said.

The SSS HOFer mentioned he had been in contact with former Sonics and Seattle City Council contender James Donaldson about co-ownership of a potential team, as well as other former NBA players. Sadly, Bart Kofoed could not be reached for comment in time for the story.

Donaldson, however, took a less rosy view of Payton's timeline. "Probably within the next 5-10 years realistically," Donaldson told the Times' Percy Allen. "Three years might be overly optimistic unless everything really lines up and plays out just perfectly."