Sorry

This is what it has come to, Sonic fans. From Warriors coach Mike Montgomery, after yesterday's game between Golden State and Seattle:

"This is one we had to have. (The players) knew that. I knew that."

That sound you hear is the remainder of the air being let out of last year's balloons. Somebody notify the autorities, because we have now become the team that mediocre teams expect to beat. The team that if the Warriors had not beaten, Monty would have had to explain why. The team that was getting 9 points against the flippin' Golden State Warriors.

Folks, it just doesn't get much worse than this. Unless Ray Allen was resting in a hyperbaric chamber filled with Michael Jordan's mojo while enduring his 3-game suspension, we have no chance at even being on the "bubble" for the playoffs, let alone making them.

Game Day: Warriors

The Sonics take on another team in a bit of a slide this afternoon: The Warriors. G-State has dropped five in a row in the New Year, pulling them down out of the playoff race into 10th place (welcome to the club, fellas).

Anyway, the Sonics stand a chance for a victory this afternoon, but I'm not laying any money on it.

Request

Probably my favorite gift of the holiday season came from my brother; a VHS tape of the 1988-89 Sonics season. There they were, in all their glory: Ellis, X-Man, Derrick, Soul Glow, Sedale, Alton Lister, Nate, John Lucis, OP, Russ Scoene ... unbelievable.

But what really struck me in watching the video was the point guard talent on that squad. Take a look:

1. Nate McMillan (4,893 career assists)
2. John Lucas (6,454)
3. Avery Johnson (5,846)
4. Sedale Threatt (3,613)

That's more than 20,000 assists - on one team! Amazing, really.

All of which leads me to a request. Does anyone out there know how I can transfer the VHS tape to my computer, so we can upload random bits of the footage? I'm sure I'm not the only one who'd like to see Hakeem take on Michael Cage in a one-punch fight (you've got to see it to believe it), or Derrick McKey throw down over Manute Bol (again, see to believe).

Anyone?

Game Night: Love the Glove

Seattle’s all-time greatest player returns home tonight as the Sonics match up with Gary Payton and the Miami Heat. The Glove is now merely a Mitten, but he’s still likely to be the first guy ever drafted by the Sonics to make it in the Hall of Fame (unless you count this guy, and that's just mean).

Anyway, the Heat are rounding into shape under new coach Pat Riley. Antoine Walker has moved into the reserve SF role nicely, JW and Payton make a nice PG combination, and Shaq appears to be finding his legs. Combine Shaq’s improving ankle and Seattle’s dearth of big men, and we could be looking at a big night from the big fella.

It’s still not known whether Sugar Ray will be in the starting lineup, but let’s assume he’s not, meaning The Omen gets his fourth start of the season. Ordinarily, this would be a disaster, but even more of disaster would be trying to watch Ray Allen guard Dwayne Wade. Quite frankly, I think I’ll take Wilkins’ D and marginal O over Sugar Ray’s marginal D and superstar O in this case.

Last year, much was made of the Sonics’ statistical staff noticing that Wade favored going in a particular direction when he had the ball, enabling the Supes to hold him to 39% shooting in their two matchups (both of which the Sonics won). Can the same statistical insight benefit Seattle again? Somehow, I think DW will have figured a way to get off.

Of course, the big question – as mentioned at sonicscentral.com – is how many fouls the Frenchie/Swifty combo will rack up guarding the Big Diesel? Can we be approaching the rare double-6? Will there be a Potato sighting? Is the question mark button still work on my keyboard after this paragraph?

Bottom Line: Heat 101 – Sonics 90

Bonus Prediction: Gary Payton's Line: 15 points, 7 assists

(Update: Ray Allen is out for 3 games, while Keyon "The Menance" Dooling was tagged with a 5-game suspension. You can read the Times' version here.)

Caught on Tape!

Here is the laugh-out-loud funny video of the Smackdown in Seattle last night (courtesy of ESPN). Check out Dooling's daring attempt to sneak into the Sonics locker room to lie in wait for Ray-Ray. He's like a ninja or something!

It brings back fond memories of the epic Xavier McDaniel vs. Wes Mathews fight in the 1980's. Remember that picture of X-man choking the life out of Mathews (which Nussbaum had lamenated on his Pee-Chee in high-school) and Mathews' famous "Your bald head is mine!" quote?

Sigh. You know your team is struggling when the highlight of the season is a 10-second slap-fight.

Berserker!

"You shall soon feel my wrath, Mr. Dooling!"

Don't mess with Ray-Ray.

After receiving one too many hard fouls from Keyon Dooling, Ray Allen turned into Chuck Norris, putting the beat-down on Key-Doo. The fight spilled into the stands and looked eerily like last year's Artest Fest. Luckily, this is Seattle and we are all pussies, so the fisticuffs ended quickly.

Inspired by Raging Ray, the Sonics went on to beat the Magic 113-104, leading by as many as 20 points in the second half.

Rashard Lewis carried the team with 45 points, while Lil' Frodo chipped in with 23 points, including 4-4 from three-point range.

Magic trick for struggling Supes?

The stumbling Sonics, losers of four out of their last five games, take on the equally stumbly Magic, who have also lost four of five, at 7pm tonight at the Key. Something’s gotta give, folks!

Check out the preview at Supersonics.com

A Duhon Deal?

Hoopshype is full of Sonics rumors today, from the return of Krautzy to the Sonics bench, to the ongoing Earl Watson story. Longtime Supersonicsoulster "B_con" points out an interesting story about Chris Duhon coming to Seattle for The Potato and a stiff to be named later.

So, do you think this would be a good deal for the Supes, or do you have a better idea? The floor is open for debate.

(And please, for the love of God, no Danny Fortson for Paul Pierce trades!)

Game Night: Pistons

While all eyes are on Rick Sund, the Sonics’ GM explains in this article that there won’t be any moves for at least two to three weeks, until Coach Hill has had a chance to take a look at his new rotation.

Hill also tossed in this beautiful swipe at The Magician, “You can't rotate 10 or 12 guys. You've got to have 8 1/2, nine guys max. And maybe Robert (Swift's) that half guy. And Robert's got to play.”

Amen, Bob. I can’t count how many times I anguished over the chaotic substitution pattern Weiss used during his reign. Of course, if the Sonics lose five in a row, Hill may be changing his tune. Losing tends to spoil one’s plans.

Anyway, the Sonics are, as they say up in Canada, “in tough” against the Pistons in Detroit tonight. One big fear is who will guard Chauncey Billups – because Ridnour is going to have a hell of a time defending him when he posts up. Oh, and there’s the question of getting rebounds when you’ve got Frenchie going up against Big Ben, and Radman trying to box out Rasheed Wallace. Oh, and can Sugar Ray put any stops to Rip Hamilton? Yikes.

Folks, the Bob Hill era may be experiencing its first slaughter tonight. That’s okay, though, because even Phil Jackson couldn’t help the Sonics tonight. But there’s no need to worry, Sonic fans, because right after the Pistons it’s a trip to the Big Apple for a matchup with Isaiah and his Big-Money All Stars!

The Bob Hill era starts NOW!

Bob Hill will try to resisitate the struggling Sonics tonight as the team faces off against the Chicago Bulls at 5:30.

In case you missed it, Art Thiel wrote an interesting article about the new coach to get you prepared for the Hill Era.

Goodbye Cleaves, hello Watson?

The house cleaning has begun.

A day after firing head coach Bob Weiss, the Sonics released point guard Mateen "Meat" Cleaves.

Could this be a precursor to a trade (possibly involving former Sonic Earl "The Hurl" Watson), or does new coach Bob Hill just want to show everyone who's boss by axing a popular player? Maybe it's a little bit of both, how should I know? I just work here for God's sake, get off my back! (Runs off to cry in men's room.)

Dear Bob

Dear Bob,

It’s over.

I really wanted this to work out. Honest. After Nate and Dwayne left, and Phil Jackson and Larry Brown signed on with other teams, and Paul Silas didn’t want to come here, you were my top choice to coach the Sonics.

After another humiliating blowout loss last night, however, it’s clearly time for you to go. Nothing personal. You’re a great guy. Everyone loves your card tricks. You just can’t coach worth a crap.

I know it wasn’t all your fault. AD and Garbage Bag left. Vlad’s a bitch. Every team’s got problems, Bob. Great coaches figure out ways to make it work (see last season).

You’ve always been a team player, Bob, so now it’s time to take one for the team. You know Wally and Rick won’t fire you. Not their style. Quit now, before the entire season goes down the tube. I know you’ll end up on your feet, Bob. You’ve always got that modeling career to fall back on.

Lots of Love,

Paul Merrill
H.R. Dept, Supersonicsoul.com

p.s. Do you know where we can reach Paul Silas?

(UPDATE: Dag, that was quick! Bob Weiss was officially canned today. If I knew the Sonics would grant my every wish, I would've asked them to bring back the Wheedle too!)